So, I think (emphasis on think) that I have picked a theme to stick with. It has a sticky menu bar, looks clean, and has a bit of color customization. Also, and this was the big one for me, it doesn’t put a giant picture at the top of every page, just the home page (which I am fine with). It does put the sidebar on static pages, which I don’t like, but am willing to live with that. I may yet find a way to hide it. Only time will tell.
Edit: The theme I picked, Tora, has a default picture of a guy with his watch on the right wrist. Power to the Left-handed!